Part 1

…And lastly, to stuff the banana into a tuna tail. That way the tonsils will never be able to detect the powder laced inside ♪

Ufufufu~…

D-O-N-E~!! Prepare to be lobbed, gagged, and cleansed, Shio! I’ll give you the perfect Andromedan¹ birthday~!!

Happy Birthday!

Ready boys!? Here’s to wishing Ushio happiness…

FIREEEEEEEEEEEEE~~~!!!

GYAAAAAH!!!

Ahaha, amazing. Where did you guys find those bazooka poppers?

Estimating noise levels to be around 100 decibels. Search results indicate similarities to hearing an old-train pass an underpass.

…How noisy.

You guys! There’s a limit to how little common sense you can have! Also, I can't believe you have the audacity to do this on my birthday!

What’s with your attitude? We’re just celebrating it? Can’t you be honest and just say “thanks” like a normal person?

Excuse me? How you deal with your stalking fangirls and fanboys has nothing to do with me, so I’d appreciate it if you stopped telling me what to do.

Wha… Can you not put things weirdly like that!? And stop trying to change the subject!

Okay, that’s enough, you two!

…Kurama, looks like, he’s enjoying himself.

Indeed. I was a little worried since he seemed to be too nervous to fall asleep last night, but it looks like my concerns were unneeded.

Oh, really? Then, I’ll give you your long awaited present right away.

Ushio, happy birthday. I got you a book on programming.

…Thanks for the practical gift. Way to set an example, pres—

(…I think I’ve read something like this before in Robo Mama’s user’s manual…?)

It includes information on old programming languages too, so it’s perfect for learning. If there’s anything you don’t understand, don’t be afraid to ask.

Happy birthday, Kurama-sama. Thank you very much for giving me a hairbrush on my birthday.

In return, I have bought you the latest hand mixer. Please accept this.

Thanks… …This’ll come in handy.

This is from me. It’s an assortment of spices for baking.

Wow, this is from that high-end, long-running store—

……What a bunch of weirdos.

…Just for the record, don’t expect anything in return for these. Also no takebacks.

In other words, you are incredibly happy to have received all these presents and will cherish them greatly?

Haha, That’s Ushio-kun for you. But I’m glad he’s happy.

And now, folks! Taking a break from all the gift-giving, it’s the moment you’ve all been waiting for! Put your hands together foooor the arrival of Ushio’s birthday cake~~~!

It’s a, super spicy cake… We made it… together, with Kamina-san, while… wearing, goggles…

“It’s a Bird, It’s a Plane, It’s a Scotch Bonnet? Non Non, My Friend, It’s a Trinidad Scorpion Butch T and It’s About to Give Carolina Reapers a Run for Their Money on the Scoville Scale!”

Your naming sense is as stupid as ever.

Huh? How’d you know I was the one who bestowed the name? Are you psychic?

That cake sure is red. It looks really spicy… my eyes are watering up just from getting close.

It was rough, but Kamina-san managed to make it work as a cake.

We used, chili powder… instead, of, sugar…

The sweetness and spiciness complements one another—although such a thing may seem contradictory at a glance, this cake is the perfect embodiment of equalizing such a contradiction. Have a taste, Uu-chan.

…Well, if you insist, I guess. Here goes nothing.

…!! …Delish…

What?

…I guess it gets a pass.

He says while going back for a second bite. So that means it’s good?

Uu-chan. We also prepared many of your favourite things in addition to the Carolina cake.

There’s… Dr. Ghost Pepper, here…

…Oh.

‘Kay, ‘kay! Time for us to dig in, boys!! Whether or not we can take it is a different question, though!

(…The table is covered in red. It’s not just the cake, but they really did prepare all sorts of my favourite foods and stuff…)

Ufufu. You ate it, didn’t you, Shio?

GYAH!? W-W-W-Where did you come—!

You’ve already received my present plenty ♪

Huh? That came outta nowhere. I don’t actually remember getting anything from—

…?

Nom… gh, th-this…! This is a rather potent taste…!

Gwaaaah! I-It’s sho spishy! Kamchatka fire extreme!²

Oooh, everyone’s having a blast over there!

…Fufu, I’m glad they’re having fun.

I may not be the best with loud noises… However, seeing everyone having an enjoyable time makes me incredibly happy.

…Huh?